“And God created man in his image, male and female he created them” – Genesis 1:27
The simple verse stated above is one that every Christian knows, but it’s recently been lost in the noise. More and more Christians are leaning into the world of gender confusion without even knowing it. The aesthetic that most mothers call “gender neutral” as a cute and popular “style” may actually be more subversive than many realize.
What We Have to Realize
If you are a Christian, I hope you believe that there are only two genders and that nothing we could ever do to ourselves could change that fact. As your gender, or sex, was given to you long before you were even conceived.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;” – Psalm 139:13-14
God created each one of us on purpose. Carefully and wonderfully. The moment we are conceived, our gender, or sex (as they truly are interchangeable in meaning, up until the “social construct” changed the definition in the mid-20th century), is completely decided and unchangeable thereafter. God made you who you are on purpose. Act like it!
Here Is the Trouble
“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Our world is in a mass of “gender confusion,” as insecure people, and an unfortunately rising number of adolescents, can’t seem to decide who they “truly are”, and what gender they feel “most fits them.” What’s missing, and what most are ignoring, is that we all are who we are because God made us that way. To “feel” as though one should have been born as the opposite sex is to look God in the face and tell Him that He made a mistake. As Christians who believe we are Imago Dei, it is our duty to be thankful for where God has placed us. Specifying our sex is one way to do so.
Culturally, there are ways we can do this —from clothing styles to names to jewelry to decor styles. Spiritually, there are ways to do this as well. God has called men and women to work, behave, and live differently. Aside from the physical, there are other differences as well. For instance, Men are called to lead, teach, provide for, and protect their household while loving their wife and children. Women are called to follow and respect their husbands as their helpmeet, to love their families and teach other women to do so, to teach their children the word, and to be wise with their house and finances. These are only a few examples. (Titus 2, Proverbs 31, 1 Timothy 5:8, Ephesians 5, etc.)
Yes, many of the things we are called to do in obedience to God do cross over between sexes, and most are not gender specific. But if you have read your Bible, then you will understand that God has created us with different strengths, tasks, limits, and understandings.
The Point
With some background in mind, let me express a problem with our modern Christian parenting:
In recent years, “gender neutral” has become popular in child rearing. “Sad beige mom” is a literal aesthetic you can search on Pinterest. And it is just that, sad. Simply Google “gender neutral baby” anything, and you will find swaddles, pacifiers, nursery themes, and onesies in colors of grey, white, and beige. What makes this trend sad (besides living a color-free life) is that you are giving your child —and those around them —no indication of who or “what” they are. It doesn’t stop at the clothes, but more and more children, especially girls, are being given clueless, or downright opposite sex names written on their birth records. I have observed a baby girl given the middle name “James” behind a neutral first name. I have nothing against the name James, but I do have a problem with naming a beautiful baby girl an obviously masculine name (or vice versa, which I have also seen).
I cannot comprehend, especially as a Christian, how I see beautiful little girls running around the church, with curly pigtails and adorable giggles, with undeniably confusing names. How confusing it would be to see a name on a school check-in sheet and think “boy,” but as you read the name, a small hand with pink fingernails is raised and a feminine “here!” is heard coming from the mouth of a young girl. This is confusing for everyone and unfortunate for the child to be constantly mistaken for the opposite sex. Children ought to be named with inherently masculine or feminine names based on their true sex.
As far as fashion goes, my thoughts are the same. I don’t believe that females are always supposed to wear dresses, and males always wear suits (although the 1950s fashion was reputedly attractive for both men and women). However, I do believe that it is easy to dress masculine or feminine in our culture, regardless of whether a woman wears jeans or a skirt. Over time, we have built styles that we universally consider masculine and feminine. You could argue that this is only a social construct and has nothing to do with what you actually wear, but to that I say: bogus!
I think we’d all be shocked to see a man in a bikini at a beach, though nowadays that’s more probable, and I don’t recommend Christian women wear bikinis. My point is, men and women are attracted to different things, and God created us that way on purpose. Every culture has differences between male and female. Even seeing a culture for the first time, it would be easy for one to pick out the differences. Men find women in feminine clothing who act ladylike very attractive, and what woman wouldn’t like to see her husband fit, sweaty, and chopping wood with his shirt off? (Sorry for the imagery, but we all know it’s true).
Basically…
Let your boys be boys and your girls be girls. Florals, ribbons, pink and purple, lace and sparkles; dinosaurs, blues and greens, trucks and planes, mud and muscles. There is an obvious difference, and that’s how God created male and female to be: obviously different. As Christians, it is our duty to dress, name, and raise our children in obviously different ways based on their sex, and to love them and teach them in the ways of the Lord.
(To hear more on this subject, I highly recommend this episode of the podcast What Have You, hosted by Rachel Jankovic and Rebekah Merkle.)
